Russian cows use VR to escape grim reality

Moscow's Ministry of Agriculture and Food

The world is racing at full speed to the abyss of despair, and cows can't take it anymore.

Russian farmers designed virtual reality headsets for cows to give them a relaxing, enjoyable experience in the face of an imminent catastrophe, similar to how oxygen masks work during air crashes.

Farmers argue that cows are less stressed and more optimistic about their future - and directly link the results to Putin's visionary regime.

What did cows experience with VR glasses? They saw a blueprint of a State Agriculture Innovation Development Program to build a utopian society where all meadows are owned by the herd and each cow contributes and receives according to their ability and needs. They call it the 21st Century Cowunism.

On a flipside, researchers believe new immersive technology could lead to isolation, but maybe when social needs are met online, cows won't need in-herd interaction as much.

We talked to one of the cows that had negative experiences with the new VR technology.

“Moo-moo-moo,” she admitted reluctantly. “Moo-moo,” she added with a sigh of hope.

If you watch Russian cows in a field with VR headsets on, ruminating, spacing out and looking totally cowpeaceable, you can’t help but ask yourself - is it cowpossible for humans to achieve that zen state of total calmness in real reality without plugging into the Matrix? When did we take a wrong turn in the annals of history? Why does it hurt so much physically and emotionally? Or is it just Monday?